The Mad Mad World of Lagerfeld

 

48 Karl Lagerfeld Quotes That Will Make You Ask: Genius Or Sociopath? 

• The iPod is genius. I have 300. 
• Sweatpants are a sign of defeat. You lost control of your life so you bought some sweatpants.
• It would have been difficult to have an ugly daughter.
• I didn’t play with other children.
• When I was four I asked my mother for a valet for my birthday.
• My sisters were sent away because my mother thought they were boring. I was not boring.
• Be politically correct, but please don’t bother other people with conversation about being politically correct, because that’s the end of everything. You want to create boredom? Be politically correct in your conversation.
• I’m not interested in history! That’s very childish. That’s Gay Pride.
• The worst thing is when friends say, ‘Remember the good old days?’ Forget about the good old days! That just makes your present secondhand. What is interesting is now. If you think it was better before, then you might as well commit suicide immediately.
• The brain is a muscle, and I’m a kind of body-builder.
• I am basically the most superficial person in the world.
• If you throw money out of the window, throw it out with joy. Don’t say ‘one shouldn’t do that’ – that is bourgeois.
• I hate intellectual conversation with intellectuals because I only care about my opinion.
• If I were a woman, I would love to have lots of kids. But for men, I don’t believe in it.
• Having adult children makes you look 100 years old. I don’t want that.
• I am not a second option person. It is that or nothing. If it is not the way I see it I prefer not to see it.
• I am never satisfied with myself and that is what keeps me going – I have no post-satisfaction.
• Doing collections, doing fashion is like a non-stop dialogue.
• Don’t dress to kill, dress to survive.
• I think everyone should go to bed like they have a date at the door.
• Life is not a beauty contest, some [ugly people] are great. What I hate is nasty, ugly people. The worst is ugly short men. Women can be short, but for men it is impossible. It is something that they will not forgive in life – they are mean and they want to kill you.
• Kate Middleton has a nice silhouette. I like that kind of woman, I like romantic beauties. On the other hand, the sister struggles. I don’t like the sister’s face. She should only show her back.
• My only ambition in life … is to wear size 28 jeans.
• I am like a TV antenna. I catch everything that is in the air, and then I do it my way.
• I throw everything away … The most important piece of furniture in a house is the garbage can! I keep no archives of my own, no sketches, no photos, no clothes — nothing! I am supposed to do, I’m not supposed to remember!
• I get along with everyone except for men my age, who are bourgeois or retired or boring.
• Respect is not creative … Chanel is an institution, and you have to treat an institution like a whore — and then you get something out of her.
• I can do whatever I want.
• I don’t do meetings.
• In France there are, I think, less than one per cent of people who are too skinny.
• In a meat-eating world, wearing leather for shoes and clothes and even handbags, the discussion of fur is childish.
• I’m a working-class person, working with class.
• I eat next to nothing.
• No one wants to see curvy women.
• Work is making a living out of being bored.
• I don’t care if people I admire criticize me because their opinion is valuable to me.
• I think tattoos are horrible. It’s like living in a Pucci dress full-time.
• Nothing scares me more than people with some doll collection.
• I sleep seven hours. If I go to bed at two, I wake up at nine. If I go to bed at midnight, I wake up at seven. I don’t wake up before – the house can fall apart, but I sleep for seven hours.
• I do my job like I breathe.
• I’m kind of fascist with myself, you know.
• My job is to bring out in people what they wouldn’t dare do themselves.
• I don’t want to be on the Internet.
• The way I talk is bizarre.
• I’m very much down to earth, just not this earth.
• I have no human feelings.
• Everything I say is a joke. I am a joke myself.